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Morning fail

B-man woke up at 1:30, whimpering from his ear infection. I held him until 2 or so.

The alarm on the angle care monitor went off around 4, which made me sprint to his room in a half-awake, half-asleep daze. It stopped when I got there. I go back to bed. The alarm goes off again. Greg goes in to move him and get him on top of the motion sensor. B-man wakes up and screams for about 15 more minutes. He’s so furious he kicks his “Dancing Bear” down the length of the crib.

While leaving for work I realize Greg has (once again) put my shoes in a big pile outside in the garage. He hates when I don’t put them away, so when he “picks them up” his solution is to throw them into the garage, which is dirty and full of spiders. My heels are thrown in a pile with basically every shoe he owns. He hates that I don’t put my shoes away, I loathe his shoe pile. It’s a problem we need to solve for the good of our marriage…either that or one day I’m going to throw all his shoes into the water softener.

On the drive to work I follow a truck that is actively swerving into the other lane. I’m pretty sure the driver is either drunk or VERY left dominate.

I realize I’ve forgotten deodorant five miles into my drive and it’s going to be 90 today.

When I FINALLY get to the highway there is a giant accident that has traffic backed up for miles. You know it’s bad when you’re at a dead stop on the on-ramp to I-70.

Rolling into the garage (20 minutes late) I realize I’ve left my garage pass in the other car.

When I get into the garage I also realize, CRAP!, today is the day when we need to have our IDs because they’re turning on the card readers for the first time and I won’t be able to get into my office without it. Where is the damn thing?!?! Tear the car apart (actually find my Nalgean bottle…awesome) and realize my card is actually in my bag…phew. But, of course, the clip is broken.
When I get into the building, ready to use my card, the card readers aren’t turned on.

Giant morning fail. Time for some coffee.

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